What did the girl with cancer get for her birthday? Hairspray.

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Why did John McCain lose the election? He did not get as many votes as Barack Obama.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

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Gretta has five legs? -no

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How do u make a black man cry? Kill his family!

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Why does ISIS want guns? Because they wanted to kill. Duh.

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What is Osama Bin Laden's favourite colour? Doesn't matter. He's dead.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Q: What is worse than getting stung by a bee? A: Your breath. Please have a mint.

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Artichoke is a vegetable state induced by swallowing paint

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What did the cowboy say when he went into the car showroom in Germany? He commented on the models and designs, and asked to try a few out. Then he left, saying he would consider buying one but didn't want to commit too suddenly or too soon.

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How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

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Why is it bad luck for a black cat to cross your path? I'll tell you in Heaven

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When life gives you lemons you squirt them in someones eyes and steal what life gave them.

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A man gets home from work with red on his collar. His wife asks what it is. The man replies "I had sex with a young woman, your to old and you disqust me"

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whats big and green, andif it falls from a tree , it can kill you? a golfcourse

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what's worse, ten babies stapled to a tree or one baby stapled to ten trees?

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Why did Steven Hawkins die? he got a virus

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Knock knock Shut up

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Read in a Jersey accent: SOOOOOO my friend __________ saw this coffee shop in new jersey! He was like.... i love coffee why dont they give it to me for free???? The man at the coffee shop Killed me! that is why coffee is not free!

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Your momma so fat that she went to the doctor and he told he to cut down on the junk food because she weighs more than the average human being

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If I told you I was straight I'd be lying

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"What's funnier then this joke? Women's rights." *Your suggestion is contradictory considering the fact that you are implying "Women's rights" is more humorous than "Women's rights".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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