What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your mother getting raped by your sister.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

There was 3 floors in a building. The man outside was watering plants. The man on the first floor was doing laundry. The man on the second floor was peeing out the window because the toilet wasn't working. The man on the third floor was cutting vegetables and accidentally dropped his knife out the window. Now, the four men all went out to tell what they did that day. The man on the third floor said that he was cutting veggies and dropped his knife out the window. The man on the second floor said that he got his wiener cut off. The man on the first floor said that he was just doing laundry. Then, the man outside said that he was watering plants and found a delicious sausage on the ground and he ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did the girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? A wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn the people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? cause he had mad-cow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican Cross the road? He was on His way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was walking to his car, racist....just kidding, he was on his way to rob a bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: What's red, pink and spins round and round? A: A baby in a blender Q2: What's red, pink, green, and smells bad? A2: The same baby 2 weeks later

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumbty took a great fall Because he was terribly intoxicated And failed to probably balance himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? She had no purpose.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did Suzie get raped? because she was out past her bedtime. and the morale to this story is that its funny to be raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

When life gives you lemons, you are most likely in the fruit section of the grocery store.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what did the African baby get for his birthday?..... AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +4

96 there mad at each other instead its 69

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: What's the difference between a duck? A: An orange.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was the Pædophile arrested? He hit his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's funnier than one anti- joke? Two anti- jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

i hate when mothers said " clean your room" me " why " mom " because we have guest coming " me " oh i am sorry i didn't know we are all gathering in my f**king room

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a white person? Caucasian

thumb_up thumb_down +4

two peanuts walked into a bar they both sat down and immediately left once they found out the bar was serving peanuts.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between a ferrari and pile of dead babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What happened when Stephen Hawking tried to go down the stairs? He fell and suffered minor injuries.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

– Hello. Is this a laundry? – Yes, it is a laundry.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops