A man walks into a bar. He drinks then comes home to his whole family murderd and mutilated

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Roses are red Violets are red Your flowers are red Yes set your garden on fire

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- Wanna see a magic trick? - Sure - Too bad. I don't know any.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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your mother is so obese, that she really should look into eating a well balanced diet and taking part in an excercise plan that suits her

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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YEAH WELL SMELL YOUR BREATH U BELLEND

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Yesterday I told a chemistry joke. There was no reaction.

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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Three tomatoes were walking down the street, a daddy, a mummy and a baby and...wait did I say tomatoes, sorry, I meant people.

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What happened to the guy that got a perfect score on his S.A.T.'s? He was murdered.

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Why did the priest take a little boy into the back room? To talk about the boy's future.

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Why did the black man jump off of a bridge? -He was in depression and comitted suicide.

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What did the parrot say to the dumb man? Nothing

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Doctor, I've caught a cold. Take a Halls.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have alziemers banana cookie!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Refrigerators are whitWhen falling from trees, they kill you

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Jeff: Did you know, someone called you an owl? Billy: Who?

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whats funnier than anti jokes nothing

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What do you call five black guys surrounding one white guy who bosses them around? Whatever his name is.

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Q.Why was the fat man sweeting A. Because he just ran and his body is trying to maintain thermal equilibrium

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get mowed down by a tractor

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Sally went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. She was exhausted and died of dehydration at the top.

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whats red and all over the road your family after a horrific car crash

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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