Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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What does two plus two equal? 4

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Tim: You wanna hear an anti-joke? Billy: Yes! Tim: Okay, I've got one for you Billy: Let's hear it! Tim: 1

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Why cant Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he is married.

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What's brown and sticky??? A brown stick

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How does a Chinese person wear a contact lens? On a 45 degree angle

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What's funny to laugh at dying? JEWS!

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A panda walks into a bar. He eats but then is tranquilized and taken back to the zoo.

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Two men walk in to a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H20" The second man says "I'll have some H20, too." They both received glasses of water.

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Why was the little girl crying? She got raped by a giant scorpion.

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Kid One: "Hey, you! Do you know how to spell "I CUP'?" Kid Two: " Sure, F-A-G....G-O-T..." Kid One: ".........."

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How did Hitler fit 100 jews in his car? He didn't, he was too busy killing them in concentration camps.

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what did the African kid get for his birthday AIDS

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A disabled man walked into a- That can't be right

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Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

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What do you call a homosexual in a wheelchair? A cripple

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a horse walkes into a bar... never mind that's just Sarah Jessica Parker

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Why did the road cross the chicken? The 2 nouns in the sentence has been switched.

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"Solids tunderf" he said, while chewing his gum.

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What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

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Your mom is not fat!

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If somebody chucks skittles at you saying taste the frickin rainbow Run over them with a car and say "NationWide is on your side!!! ????

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A blonde and a brunette nearly fell off a cliff and were hanging on for dear life. The brunette found the strength to climb back onto the ledge. The blonde was impressed and had muscular dystrophy so she lost the strength to hold on any longer and fell to her death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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