A blind man walks in a bar I mean like a metal bar But it didn't hurt He only laught

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Getting laid at the special Olympics.

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The guy told a funny joke. Why wasn't the other guy laughing? Because he was having a heart attack

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what did the chicken say to the other chicken? nothing, they dont talk.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Poetry is hard And so is wood

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Whats worse than spilling ketchup on your shirt? Getting hit by a bus

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was a really creepy movie

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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An Irishman walks into a bar he asks for directions, and leaves.

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Pull my finger ouch..

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

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Your mom is so stupid she has trouble holding a steady job and struggles to support her family.

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Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

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Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

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Dani Barton is not that! She is a great girl with a strong heart and feelings. The statement below is a joke, hence why it was published on AntiJokes. This is NOT a joke however.

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A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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A man had come into a bar. No wait, it was a horse. A man had come into a horse.

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What's red and can't speak ? A strawberry

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TOP COMMENT IS MINE!

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into your grandmother and finding a fish

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-Knock, knock! -Who is it? -Me

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If you are American when you walk into a bathroom and American when you walk back out, what are you when you are inside the bathroom? You're probably dispelling waste products from your body.

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The king asked the jester why was he not telling jokes. He wasn't because he's a jester and therefore is obligated to be funny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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