Sidney Crosby comes face-to-face with Alex Ovechkin. The Penguins were playing the Capitals.

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(waving left hand) Why doesn't Queen Elizabeth wave with this hand? Why? Because this is my hand.

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My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

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A bloke walks into a bar. He doesn't say 'ouch' because it was a public house and not a hard surfaced object as you may have thought initially

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A blonde was drinking water from the water fountain. She was very thirsty.

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Why did Jenny fail her driving test? She was hit by a train.

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Why did the murder walk up to the lady in the car? It was his mom.

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What's worse than getting a paper cut? Getting shot in the face.

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What's the best part of any family reunion? Sodomy.

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What happens when you give someone a free chocolate bar? ThEeyroast it and vapourise it intheir hands....no they eat it

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Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

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sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

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Knock knock, Who's there The delivery man The delivery man who Just take this package

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What do you call a black man that has a family with a white woman? A good husband and father who had a stable job in a not so stable economy. The current issues of inflation has made it hard for him, but his dedication pays his bills and feeds his family. He later will die a sad death caused by prostate cancer at the age of 47.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Fish don't run.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

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How can you shed 10 pounds in one day? Get your legs amputed.

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My dog got out of it's cage. So I found it and be the shit out of

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A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

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Roses are red violets are blue, he is for me and not for you, he's too ugly you can have him

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knock knock who's there... you you who who the fuck are you

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3 men are stranded on an island when they come across a brass lantern. The rub it and nothing happens. They all starve to death a day later.

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So there is a blind man... and he walks past a fish market and takes a deep breath and says"Oh boy it sure does smell like fish out here".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops