Why did the plane crash? because there were two towers in front of it.

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Sometimes black people kill other black people.

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What's worse than walking into a lampost? Your seven year old child accidentally finding and watching a sex tape that you made years ago.

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how do you kill a blond? give her a gun and tell her it a blow dryer

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Knock Knock Who's there? a tree

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If there are four gay men that come into a bar and need to sit down when all you have is one stool; what do you do? Get three more stools.

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LUKE, I am your father... this is your mother, your parents dont love you so we've adopted you

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Boys go to college to get more knowledge, girls go to Jupiter... Actually I lied, girls go to the kitchen

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out if the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, Monkey do.

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i like my coffee like i like my women. without a penis.

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Q: Why don't chicken breasts have nipples? A: because if you freeze them, they will pop the package.

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If a small quiz is a quizicle then what is a small test? A quiz.

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why did the little boy fall over? he was hit in the face by a salmon.

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What did the golfer do when he hit a shot with a lot of pressure on him into the water? He dropped another ball and continued on, for golf is a civilized game and bad manners are prohibited.

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A: Knock Knock! B: RING THE DOORBELL YA DUMMY

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Sidney was a man, but not just any man... He was a fishmonger.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why the fuck he crossed the road, I don't know what he is thinking.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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Send "What Makes You Beautiful" Ringtone to your CellShowHideSong Notes - Go behind the words! You're insecure, don't know what for You're turning heads when you walk through the do-o-or Don't need make-up - to cover up Being the way that you are is eno-o-ough Everyone else in the room can see it Everyone else but you Baby you light up my world like nobody else The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed the way you smile at the ground, it ain't hard to tell You don't know Oh oh You don't know you're beautiful! If only you saw what I could see you'd understand why I want you so desperatley Right now I'm looking at you and I can't believe You don't know Oh oh You don't know you're beautiful! Read more: ONE DIRECTION - WHAT MAKES YOU BEAUTIFUL LYRICS http://www.metrolyrics.com/what-makes-you-beautiful-lyrics-one-direction.html#ixzz1sJdk3KHD Copied from MetroLyrics.com

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If you're having girl problems, I feel bad for you, son... Because I can empathise with you, and it's not a very nice situation to be in. Hope you work it out.

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whats worse than bitting into ur apple and finding a worm? bitting into ur apple an finding out u have just murded noddy and his family who were making a nice little home in there

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Person 1- Ask me if I am a tree Person 2- Ok, are you a tree? Person 1- Nope

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Why did Michael Phelps drown? He didn't because he is the best swimmer in olympic history.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops