Why cant Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles read? Because they are blind you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock Knock Whos there? The Police, your mother just died of bowel cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what would Jesus do? Get crucified and die.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a gynochologist named John? John

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I love you Itachi Uchiha, please let me lick ice cream off of your body and oh crap you're an anime character and not real never mind

thumb_up thumb_down +1

hi im bob i ate a Pickle sucked a boob and died of a haert atak

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Last night, I awoke to the unsettling sound of an alarm. My initial thought was fire. However, after analyzing the situation, I realized that it was only my alarm clock. I turned off the alarm clock, and got out of bed. Then my brother walked in my room and hit me in the face with a toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken croos the road? He was battling severe depression at the time. His alcoholism was tearing his family apart, he was declining in job performance and his boss threatened to fire him several times. I guess at that point he just decided to end it all. It was horribly tragic, policemen knocking on the door of his wife's chicken roost and informing her of the bad news. As soon as she heard, she rushed to the scene, only to see his mangled body spread across the street, intestines falling out. They held a closed casket funeral. Formal, all black. It was raining by the time the casket was brought to the cemetery to be buried. She hasn't stopped crying since. His children ask her, where's dad, but all she can do is weep. Suicide is bad, kids

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Chocolate makes everything better, except obesity.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances, one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends PS: the one above was wrong sorry :(

thumb_up thumb_down +1

If a blonde and a feather were dropped off of a building at the same time, which would hit the ground first? A feather is a light object and would most likely float all the way down at a slow velocity, the blonde is most likely 100+ pounds and would die because she is stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you get if you cross an angle with an antelope? An anglelope.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are Red Toilets are Blue Get out of Me way I Need to POO!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q-how many dead babies does it take to paint your geradge door? A-one if you throw it hard enough

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was the chipmunk watching TV? Because a new Family Guy was on.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Turn your Caps Lock off, people think you're yelling at them, Stephen Hawking.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have cancer, Herp Derp

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats worse than a friend asking you if their ugly, telling them to look in the mirror.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats brown and booky a book.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the man get frustrated searching through a box of forks? He was looking for a spoon.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

There is big difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse And helping your uncle jack off a horse

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A ginger man ascends to heaven and reaches the pearly gates, seconds later he wakes up in a hospital bed and realizes it was merely a near death hallucination and God isn't real.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

a christian man asked god a question. he did not get an answer. a jewish man asked god a question. he did not get an answer. a muslim man asked god a question. he too, did not get an answer. an atheist man asked god a question. he got his answer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops