chuck norris does not know how to use a plunger.

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One day a there was a guy walking down the street. If you thought this was a joke, you're wrong.

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So a man walks into a bar... ouch

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Knock Knock Who's there? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny your son let me in mom! Son, I have something to tell you. What? Well, you're actually adopted *sobs*

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Gun laws don't work because criminals don't pay attention to the laws

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What do you call a blonde with a diploma? Dum,because blondes are still dum

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how doyou wake up lady gaga youu poke er face

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What do you call a man who has been run over by a car? An Ambulance

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what gets louder as it gets smaller? a baby in a trash compacter.

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why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

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a farmer asked me "were is my pig?" and I said ' I got hungry" :()

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What do you catch a baby with? A pitchfork

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so you're waling through the desert and a tire falls off your canoe. How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse?

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i dont know why but when ever i see jew they always say "whats up?"

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I walk into Tesco and wrestle an obese women for a packet of ''Mini's Biscuits''. This quarrel was over nothing but a trolley filled with them. I gradually became infuriated. Meanwhile, an employee commited suicide.

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How do you make an elf sad? Murder his family.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Once upon a time there was a cowboy. He died. The end.

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What did the boy say when he got hit by a car? Nothing, he punctured his lungs.

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a red corvette? i don't have a red corvette in my garage

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Why are blondes so dumb? They aren't dumb they just have prejudice against them

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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