What's green, fuzzy, and can kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table.

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Why did the little boy fall down? Be he had the downs.

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why couldn't the little boy sleep? he was being tortured.

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What's black on bottom and white on top?? Society

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was trying to kill himself in the fastest and easiest way due to his drinking problems, which in the first place separated him him from his wife, who is fighting with him in court for custody of there only child ,Steven. He can not even pay the rent on his apartment or hold a job to pay child support..he is also in debt.

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what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

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This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

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After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

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Oh," the boy says. "Well BUENOS DIAS to you too!!!

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Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

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whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

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A man walked into a bar. He got drunk. What did u think he'd do, have coke-a-cola? Dumbass.

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steve walked into a bar, what happened next? A: He fell down.

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If a tree falls on a woman and there's no one around to hear her scream why did a tree fall in the kitchen?

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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A father was angry at his daughter's boyfriend because he took her virginity. The boyfriend said he was ashamed that he never told her he has AIDS.

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Nothing. He made it home safely.

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what did hayley say to missy last night? I'm tired bye

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What did the quarter say to the dime? nothing.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

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Patrick: My name is 24. Spongebob: Hey, Patrick, you know whats worse than 24? Patrick: What? Spongebob: 911.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

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Slow and steady wins the race, But only in some cases. Mostly never.

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What happened to the boy who spilled his fruit punch on the president? He was offered a new one compliments of Obama himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops