Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

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Q. How do you make your dog stop barking? A. Take it to the grocery store. Replace it with any popsicle in the fridge.

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Your mother is so large she finds it difficult to fit into regular sized clothing

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A: Knock Knock B: The door is open please come in.

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What's red and shiny? Not the holocaust

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

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Me: You want pie? You: Yeah what flavour? Me: Pie flavour.

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Why did your mom fall off the swing? I shot him.

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how do you punish helen keller? leave the plunger in the toilet.

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Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11 9/11 who? You said you'd never forget!

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Q:How do you fit ten babies into a bucket? A: A blender Q:How do you get them out? A: Nachos

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What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already taken her police statement and she doesn't want to discuss the incidentit anymore until her lawyer arrives.

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what does the black man say to the white man? nice weather were having huh.

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Q: What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white? A: Alive

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Why did the cat die? To get to the other side

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-Knock-knock. -Who's there? -Interrupting Doctor. -Interrup.. -You have cancer.

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1. Why did sally fall of the swing? -because she had no arms. 2.Knock Knock -Who's there? Not sally.

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Why are some people so emotional? Because some their family were hit by a train and then died the next day of lung cancer.

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roses are red, violets are blue i couldnt spend one night without you

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I'm HIV positive.

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One night a man layed on his bed and looked into the skies, then he realizes: WHERE THE HELL IS MY CEILING!?!?!

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Dislike this joke for a cookie However if you like this joke you dont get a cookie

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What do you call a fridge? A Fridge

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops