What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

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What's black, white,and red all over? A crime scene where a black and white man were brutally murdered by a psychopath that is still on the loose and could be killing someone else.

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How's your mum? she's dead..

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What did the nurse say to the doctor? Boo-hoo, i was pranked over the phone, i'm gonna kill myself now.

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Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

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Why was the man sad after mowing is lawn? He ran over his dog.

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A priest and a bunch of boys are in a room. They are having choir practice.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

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What's brown and sticky? a stick.

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What did the small baby faucet say to the daddy faucet? Nothing, they are inanimate objects and cannot talk.

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why did the chicken cross the road ??? why would you care??

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A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

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you momas so fat, you momas so ugly Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great Salvador Dali mistook them for cloth.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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Are you from Tennessee? cuz i wanna makeout with your face.

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What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

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Cancer victim: What kind of doctor are you? Person 2: I'm not a doctor. In fact, I'm a suicide bomber and am planning to initiate the detonation sequence right now. Cancer victim: Well, it doesn't really matter. No matter who shows up, I'll still die anyways. This way, I'll be able to pay a visit to the transcendent city high in the heavens sooner. Person 2: I bet that many would mourn your death at your remembrance ceremony. Cancer victim: That doesn't bother me. My friends and family are close to my heart, but that doesn't warrant eternal proximity with one another in itself. Person 2: Let's go to a better place. Let us finally break free of our mortal chains that have unceasingly been hindering our progress since the first war took place. Cancer victim: Wait, I've changed my mind! Person 2: Too late. I wish I had a time machine... not.

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How many republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Typically only one, though more may be required under extreme conditions.

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Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

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a:two guys are white but one of the guys can only see black and white so he said dude you black he said no so they have a race who won :nobody they both got hit by a bus then a car then a donkey eaea then a horse

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Jesus

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There are 3 type of people in the world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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Why did the boy cry? Because he was mercilessly beaten by his mother.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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