Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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Hey! I just met you. And this may seem crazy. So here's my number: Now Get in the van.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sheriff Sheriff who? Sheriff Robinson your husband has died in a local car accident.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This is a poem The End

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What do you call a black man with a hammer in his head? Dead.

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What do you get when you cross an own and a bungee cord? My ass

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Timmy: "Dear Santa, why don't you ever come to my house?" Santa: "Because you don't have parents, Timmy" THE END

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Do you smell that? Sex and candy?

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Three girls are eating icecream one girl sucks on her icecream the second girl licks on her icecream and the third girl bites on her icecream. Q: Which of the three girls is married? A: The girl with the wedding ring.

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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What did the horse say to the farmer who tried to feed him hay soup? I don't like that.

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You'er moma is so stupied that she climbed over the glass window to see what on the other side

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being chased by a coyote that hadn't eaten in several days.

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Actually it was me Josh brown

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And the girl said: "I'll be ready in 2 hours!"

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A duck walks into a bar Its theoretical comical universe implodes from the destructive weight of inevitable punchlines and everyone in the bar dies.

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How did Helen Keller’s parents punish her? By grounding her.

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Why did the man stop smoking? Because he was shot in the face.

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What is worst about the great white shark? It's hundreds of sharp teeth, strong tail, or subtle racism? Probably the teeth.

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What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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whats a joke

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What do you call a black garbage man? A garbage man

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What's worse than the holocaust? Another holocaust.

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Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. Q: The one stopped. Why? A: His brother fell off, cracked his head, started uncontrollably bleeding and died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops