Why is a cookie like a jellyfish? Because it has no bones. (Contributed by my 4-year old boy)

How many Poles does it take to change a lightbulb? Just the one, usually.

Why did the business man jump into a mud puddle? He didn't. He was brutally stabbed to death then thrown in a pigpen in an attempt to conceal the evidence.

Their was three black men that walked into a bar. They then ordered three drinks and had sex... I lied about walking into a bar

A guy killed his kids and wife Pokémon GO also exists

Want to hear a dirty joke? Jonny played in the mud. Want to hear a clean joke? Jonny took a bath with bubbles. Want to hear a dirty joke again? Bubbles was the girl next door, Jonny raped her.

There were two mufins in an oven. They did not say anything because muffins are incapable of speech.

Their is a stripper, a prostitute, and a pole dancer on a plane that is about to crash. They all die.

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

Justin Beiber sings. people don't listen.

What store adopted the dog ? The Pound

Two Naked men jump off a cliff. Three months later, an entire pack of Cub Scouts were enrolled in group therapy. It's ongoing.

Why did the kid with no legs fall down the stairs? Because his dad pushed him...

you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

Two Muffins in an oven One muffin looks at the other muffin and says: "Oohhhh it's hot in here!". Then the other muffin says: "Oohhhh a talking muffin!"

A white,mexican and asian man are walking together on the beach. They find a genie lamp and the genie says"since there are 3 of u u each get one wish" the black man says " i wish that all the mexicans would go back to mexico. " the asian man says " i wish all the asians would go back to asia" and the white man says " wait so the mexicans and asians arent in america right?" the genie said "that is correct!" the white man says " oh ok ill just taqke a coke then!"

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

It got hit by a rocket.

How did the weak old man with cancer beat it? He hung himself.

What red and goes up and down? A tomato in an elevator.

Whats red and tastes like parsley? Not Red Parsley

Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

Why did the fat boy cry? His grandmother died

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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