What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why does the Gay guy have a bell on his bike? Because its the only way his blind dog can follow him.

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How many women does it take to replace a light bulb? Please advise. Thanks, Holly

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Why do black guys always have sex on their mind? Because they are men.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR! NOW!

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Knock knock Who is there? Your mom Your mom who? STOP WITH THIS GAME AND JUST OPEN THE DOOR!

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Why did the black lady pick out a white dress? Because she thought it was a pretty white dress.

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monster under your bed? thank god im in your closet...........

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

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What did the dog get for Christmas? euthanization

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I like my women like I like my pancakes: Flipped over, inanimate, motionless, and covered in my syrup.

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A White and a Chinese got in a fight, who won? None. The fight was unable to begin because a color is not a living organism.

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home

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whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead black guy on the road? there is skid marks leading up to the dog.

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what does the muslim guy say in a very busy metro station? jaallalalalalalalalla BAM

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Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

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My mum is called Steve

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Q. What has four legs, but can't walk? A. A dog dying of a serious illness...

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Q-What did the hobo get for Christmas? A-Pneumonia.

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When the tsunami hit in 2004, christians worldwide prayed for the victims. it didnt help

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RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

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So, a boy walks into a baker's shop and asks for a loaf of bread. The man says "do you want white or brown?" The boy says "oh, I don't mind, I've got my bike outside."

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Rose are red, I dont give a shit. When I think of you, I play with my clit. :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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