Q: what does a worm and a fish have in common? A: they are both a worm, apart from the fish

2 sausages were in a frying pan. 1 sausage says it sure is hot in here, the other sausage says WTF a talking sausage!

Why was the little boy crying? Because he had an undescended testicle

Q: What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole? A: A pedophile.

Wanna know how to confuse a black guy? Give him a fried chicken sandwich with mayo on it.

While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

Your mom is so poor She will soon have to make the difficult decision whether or not to put you up for adoption

what happened to the man who walked into a bar he slipped from the bar of soap and died

What happened to the Mexican who commited suicide? He died.

I scream. You scream. We all scream and huddle in a corner of our first grade classroom because of a masked gunman.

Three gay men walk into a bar and there is only one three-legged stool. What do they do? --One man politely tells one of the other men to have a seat and then the two remaining men leave and have a one-night stand.

Nina and Harry sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes divorce because their marriage didn't turn out right and Harry hit Nina in the head with a iron...

Why are kenyans so fast? Because due to evolutionary changes, people from that area of the world have evolved to have superior muscle builds to sprint, hence giving them a natural advantage against an equally trained athlete form another part of the world with an equal skill level

Why was the 13 year old drug addict crying? Because somebody shot him in the foot

Why was the dog hairless? I lied, it was a pig.

Whats Jewish and Funny? A Jewish Comedian.

Why doesnt a chicken wear pants? Because its pecker is on his head.

do you listen to dubstep? OH YEA I LOVE SKRILLEX -_-

Why can't Emily swing because she has no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Emily

Why did Sally fall of the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

What group of people do the police target? Criminals.

What does a dyslexic person do on sundays? Goes to church to pray to Dog

Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

Haikus are easy But they often dont make sense flying flamingos

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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