Why do I hate food? I don't.

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What did the politician say to the other politician? We are both politicians.

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Why do blind people laugh at this joke? Because they can't read it and everyone else is laughing.

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What do u do if a blonde throws a bomb at u Trigger the bomb and throw it back

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DON'T OPEN IT IT'S PANDORA'S BOX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did Robert Kardashian say at O.J.'s most recent trial? Nothing. He died of esophagal cancer

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Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack, due to her poor eating habits.

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AWWWWWW YEEESSSS!!!

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why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

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The fox said to the walrus, "Hatee-hatee-hatee-ho!" And the walrus replied, "Goo-Goo-g'joob".

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Kumquats Daffodils Alka-Seltzer Serendipity Dewey Decimal System Buccaneer Avuncular Pantaloons Weasels Alligator Chewbacca Sasquatch

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Q: Why didn't Little Jhonny go to school today? A: There was no school today.

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Q: Why did the little boy drop his toy? A: He fell and broke his wrist, then dropped it in the emergency room, due to the broken wrist.

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what did the fart say to the butt........bye

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What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a shovel? I don't have a sack of dead babies in my garage.

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. Guys holocaust jokes aren't funny Anne-Frankly, I do nazi the point in them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because that's where all of the other chickens are.

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If a llama walks into a jewelry store and a carrot has no feathers, then why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a car because chickens are simple creatures and don't understand the complex rules of the road.

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Why was the grandomther crying? She just got pepper sprayed.

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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Those last 4 were by: Walter

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Bill and John are talking about types of cheese. The conversation drags on a bit and slowly changes topic. Bill says "I bet you I can bungy jump off a bridge". John chuckles before replying "I bet you can't". They go and find a bridge and Bill puts on his harness and ties himself to the side of the bridge. He throws himself off the edge and falls through the air screaming at the top of his voice. John cuts the bungy cord and Bill dies.

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What do you call a leper in a spa bath? Say excuse me Sir (or Madam), I notice you have leprosy, did you know that it is treatable? MDT for multibacillary leprosy consists of rifampicin, dapsone, and clofazimine taken over 12 months. Dosages adjusted appropriately for children and adults are available in all primary health centres in the form of blister packages.[17] Single dose MDT for single lesion leprosy consists of rifampicin, ofloxacin, and minocycline. The move toward single-dose treatment strategies has reduced the prevalence of disease in some regions, since prevalence is dependent on duration of treatment. World Leprosy Day was created to draw awareness to leprosy and its sufferers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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