What do you call a person with no arms? Armless.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

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Why did 4 Christians, 2 Jews, 1 Muslim, 1 Buddhist and an atheist squeeze into a Honda Accord? One of their co-workers at Appleby's made a compelling case for the financial and environmental benefits of carpooling.

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Why are bowling balls racist? They are not because bowling balls are incapable of having feeling therfore they cannot have racial thoughts or actions.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she had no arms... Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

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If you watch the titanic backwards, its really about a magical ship which saves peoples lives!

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A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to a near by hospital where he is treated for a concussion.

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Your momma's so fat; She has a constant sense of insecurity due to the instability in her relationships caused by her involuntary obesity.

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Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

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Hey girl, are you from Jamaica? Cus ja makin me go temporarily insane.

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In Soviet Russia life had both pros and cons.

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What do you call a man with an Eye patch and no arms? Names.

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how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

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What do you call an Asian man without any clothes on? -naked

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Why is the sky blue? I don't know I thought you knew

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Why did susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms... Why didn't she get up? She didn't have any legs... Why didn't anyone help her? She didn't have any friends. Then she died

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Did you hear about the new German oven? Seats 40.

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What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

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What is the difference between me and you? I am not readin this joke.

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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Gay's

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What does Santa Claus keep in his gardening shed? Nothing. Santa Claus isn't real.

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Where would you find 10 dead babies buried next to each other? In a cemetary.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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