Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

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Roses are red Violets are blue... Violets are not blue they are actually purple

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how did superman die? he got cought in a plane engine!

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Your Black, Im Black, We're all Black

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A jew a muslim and a catholic walk into a doctors office. The doctor is arrested for raping a child and his office closes. The Jew and Muslim find another doctor andthe Catholic dies because he had aids

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A priest and rabbi walk into a bar, they order a few drinks, then call a cab to go home.

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Barman says to a horse at the bar ' Are you sad or upset?' Horse says 'No' Barman says 'Well why the long face?' Horse says 'Because I'm a horse'

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How many amoebas does it take to change a light bulb? Depending on your religious belief and the variation in evolutionary growth, a full study on the answer would require immense time and be very costly. I would also not feel comfortable providing an answer based on opinion or estimated guess. The answer is therefor be inconclusive.

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So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

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A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Yo mamma's so stupid, she couldn't get a high paying job and had to settle for working full time at McDonalds, just to get your family through the week.

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how did the kenyan get away from the cup He didnt he got arrested

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Jesus can walko water Humans are 70% water I can walk on humans Therefore i am 70% Jesus

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A: What did the orphan get for christmas? Q: Nothing she doesn't have any parents

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Snapple Fact #1 -slaves made life easier

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Q: What did the farmer say when his tractor broke down? A: oh noo my tractor broke down.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and asks for directions to the nearest Applebee's.

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Q: What do you get if you combine a melody, instrumentation, rhythm, and vocals? A: Um, music, you idiot.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's brown, sticky and crawls up your leg? A homesick poo.

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Me: Ask me if i'm a truck. You: Are you a truck? Me: No.

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Why did Emily fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Emily.

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This is a haiku. Not a very good haiku, But still a haiku.

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This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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