Q:Wats worse then cutting ur lawn A: diarea on a sunday morning

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Why did Suzy Fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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Oh no my baby is dead. Ha.

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A young woman goes to a wild, infamous nightclub, all alone. She arrives safely at home a few hours later.

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What happened when the wife refused to make her husband a sandwich? Since he was paralyzed from the neck down, he starved to death.

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Roses are red.

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A: Knock knock B:The door is open.

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One dog says to the other "I love going for walks!" A women over-hears, screams "A Talking Dog!", and calls the police. The dog is put down and dissected for scientific research.

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Why did the milk man cry? Cause you killed his family.

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KOOKABURRA

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What did one planet say to the other? Nothing. Space is a vacuum in which sound cannot propagate due to the absence of a matter or particle medium.

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Knock Knock Who's there It's me open the door

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Which of the following is the reason the Titanic sunk. Select all that apply. A. Iceberg B. No radar C. Late warning D. Put your hands on me Jack E. This ship can't sink F. Over by the bed, the couch G. God himself can't sink this ship Z. All the above X. None of the above Q. Why are you still reading

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Why did the little boy rush downstairs to the living room on Christmas morning? because he heard his mother screaming rape.

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This is sparta No this is patrick

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a sociopathic murderer.

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Why did the car get sucked up by the tornado? Because it was in Pilger, Nebraska.

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whats sad about 3 black people driving a Cadillac over a cliff? that was my Cadillac

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A squirrel is about to steal the eggs of a sparrow when the sparrow suddenly says, "Stop! I will do anything if you would spare my eggs!" The squirrel has no capacity to reason and so steals the eggs anyway. The sparrow is devastated.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms! Knock knock! Who'z there? Not Suzy.

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Why was the baseball player happy? He got married.

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What do you get when you jump into the Red Sea? Wet.

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what did the bull say when it got shot? nothing... its a bull

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There once was a man from Nantucket Who was stung on the head by a wasp When asked if it hurt he replied, 'not a bit, and he could do it again if he'd like to.'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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