Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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FIRE!!

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Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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Richard fell off of a cliff. He can fly.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

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A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

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Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

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Whats worse than falling down the stairs? Falling UP the stairs.

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what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

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A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

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Roses are red Violets are purple I just got raped by a clown

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Roses are der, Violets are lube, I am dyslexic.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? A Jew is a person either born into or converted to Judaism, and a Pizza is a disc shaped, oven baked bread typically topped with tomato sauce and cheese.

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What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

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whats black. an african american person

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why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

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YouTube comment: If I get a cent for every pixel on the screen. I would have... $960 for a 224p video $2049.6 240p video $1296 for a 270p video $2304 for a 360p video $4099.2 for a 480p video $9984 for a 520p video $9216 for a 720p video $20736 for a 1080p video $125829.12 for a 2304p video ... I would be RICH!!

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and Santa Claus are on a plane. This is impossible because Santa Claus does not exist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops