To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

Roses are red, Violets are blue, your parents are dead they never loved you! I found this one on facebook and i just found this site and all yall got some good jokes LOL

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

How do you call a dog with no legs? You can't call it, you have to go and pick it up.

What did the orphan do on his birthday? He burned down his orphanage, he hated the place because he was severly abused.

In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

Why aren't elephants allowed in public pools? Because they are elephants.

What happened to the white man who beat up the black man? He was arrested for assault and battery. What happened to the black man who beat up the white man? He was also arrested for assault and battery. Their races have no superiority to the law.

what did the ghost say to the bee boo-bee

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She was dead

Why is the redneck crying? They died of diabeetus.

A Jew,Spiderman and The Incredible Hulk all jump off the top of the Empire State Building,who hits the ground first? The Jew because the other two dont exist

what do you call a black man on the moon? an astronaut.

Vagina cream... end of story

Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? Because he got hit by a bus.

What's the different between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my penis up your butthole

Barney is a pedophile Loves dino molestation Stuck a dildo in his ass And died of constipation

roses are red, violets are blue, niggers are black and so is my poo

What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

What happened to the dog that ate to much? It became obese.

roses are refds violet are xaflj;k it sucks having turretts syndroewe

A blonde takes a math test it says find x? She circles x and puts there it is!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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