How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

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Q: Why did the bully hit the kid A:Because he is a bully-I thought that would have been self explanitory.

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Once there was two fish in a tank, and one said "how do you drive this thing?".

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You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

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Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

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A guy walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

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What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

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What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

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I just lost the game where if you think about the game then you lose the game. so did you.

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What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

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Roses are der, Violets are lube, I am dyslexic.

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What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

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The meme walks out of the bar.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? A Jew is a person either born into or converted to Judaism, and a Pizza is a disc shaped, oven baked bread typically topped with tomato sauce and cheese.

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What do you call a dead blond in a closet? A homicide victim.

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Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

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Q: What do a dildo salesman and a car salesman have in common? A: They are both salesman

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Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

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A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

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Why did Windows crash ? F*ck Windows, that's why.

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Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

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why did the girl smear penut butter on the road. To go with the trafic jam

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What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

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what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops