How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

what did the girl trapped in the fire say? help

Knock, Knock The door's open

If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

Knock knock Who's there? Labrinth Come in

why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

How can you kill a blonde? Hack her to bits.

What do you get when you mix a dog and a cow blood everywhere

What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A car that is driving recklessly and happens to have a Christmas paint scheme.

what is worse then stubbing your toe in the dark? -september 11th

Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

i think i have a problem with these jokes they aren't finny

Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side.

why does crazy george spin a ball on his fingers well? because he has a huge dingo

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Hey, where'd my tractor go?

What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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