Intel Core Computers answer robot flavored phones at middle of june CC

Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.... I hate your guts.

how do you make Chuck Norris laugh? tell him an anti-joke.

sorry got to poo

a guy on the street throws a boy between 2 priests

What do you call a really bad band? Nickelback.

Q: What did the duck say to the other duck? A: Quack

Why did god make asians? I dont know. Yah, me niether

Whats the difference between cake and dead babies? Cakes make people happy while dead babies are a sad and disturbing sight to see.

Yo mama is so ugly, she entered an ugly contest and placed well in her division.

-Knock-knock. -Who's there? -Interrupting Doctor. -Interrup.. -You have cancer.

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. So now he's dead. No more eating of shoes.

why did the african american man get shot? he partook in a gang life

Who ya gonna call? ... Whoever you need to talk to at the current time.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Two Muffins in an oven One muffin looks at the other muffin and says: "Oohhhh it's hot in here!". Then the other muffin says: "Oohhhh a talking muffin!"

What's the difference between a Jew and a Muslim? -You can research and find several similarities and differences, but I will not go into detail about them.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear? The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

Did you hear about the guy that lost the whole left side of his body? Well, he's all right.

A horse walks into a bar. the bartender asks: "How's the family?" The Horse says: "they are fine." Everyone runs out screaming because Horses can't talk, except the bartender. He has a mental illness.

What do you call someone who copies a previously posted anti-joke without doing any research to see if it has been posted before? a lazy good for nothing rectum licking testicle sucking gonad gobbling arse bandit with narcissism issues

Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

Caroline Kelly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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