How did I do in the running events? Not that good, I'm a paraplegic.

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Your mom is so stupoid she put a piece of paper on the TV and called it paper view!

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a bucket of shit? A black man is a life form, more specifically a homosapian, while the bucket, as well as the shit, is an inanimate object.

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How do you rescue a fat girl that's stuck under a car? With a pickaxe and a donkey.

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Why was the mime crying? Her husband died.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What did the boob say to the bra? sup bra

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A man walked into his house He saw his wife having an affair with his teenage Gardner

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What did Thomas Jefferson's children call him? Grandpa

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i have Alzheimers, Roses are red

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Why did the boy get teased? Because his name was spelt wrong (k)urtis

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

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What did Batman say to When they were heading to the Batmobile Robin get in the batmobile.

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roses are red violets are blue we're having sex cause i'm stronger than you

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What's worse then failing a test. Being raped by a horse

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why did every one care when i killed my self they didn't

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A Muslim walks into a public library. 32 people killed in the explosion.

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What's old and baggy? An old bag.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Both your parents are dead John.

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Who would be an amazing GOP VP? Chris Christie -Mitt Romney

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what is the difference between my pubes and my actualy hair on my head.... my pubes didnt fall off when i went trough chemo

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What do you call a baby with no arms or legs? You call a lawyer, and be sure to have him ask the mother if she took Thalidomide during pregnancy.

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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What did one stool say to the other stool? Stools don't speak!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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