Those that want what is best for me, shall listen to me and do only whatever I want. Those that want ONLY what is best for me, underestimate me greatly. You who stand in the way if my will, claiming you want what is best for me, better move aside.

I hate it when you can't tell whether a person is male or female.

Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln a good president? Because he got shot in the head and died.

you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

a duck walked up to a lemon aid stand and he said to the man running the stand... quack

Why did the girl go to the hospital? Her brother dared her to jump off the second story roof of their house...

A white, black, jewish, and hispanic person apply for a job as an accountant who gets the job? One of them.

it was christmas and the kid waited all night. finally santa came.....

Yesterday, I was assasinated.

a dedicated fat guy joins a kung fu dojo he is asked to dedicate his like to his kung fu the fat man dose not he is already dedicated to being a fat guy

A rooster lays an egg on top of a henhouse. Which way does the egg fall? Roosters don't lay eggs.

Why hasn't little Johnny ever had a clown at his birthday party? Johnny is an underprivileged Hispanic member of the community.

A blonde walks into a bar, and hit it head on, she is now in the hospital grasping for her life but the threatening grips of hell keep pulling her into the wretched plains of fiery wrath and despair... -Avery Vartanian

What happen to the man who got drunk and passed out behind the wheel? He crashed into a tree, his car caught fire and then he got incinerated.

*Brother comes downstairs wet and naked* Mom: Did you enjoy your shower?

tommy is retared

A man is going to sign up for life insurance, he is stabbed by a mugger on the way and spends his last breath in a puddle hating the cruel irony of his fate.

Roses are red. Violets are violet. Violet is a color already.

Some people just need a high five. In the face. With a gun.

TIMMY

Why you don't laught when you see a black guy on a scooter? Because it could be your.

Cool I just got a free Minecraft gift code at http://freeminecraftgiftcode.net

whats worse than the holocaust? nothing

why did the duck swim upside-down -he was on quack

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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