A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

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A Horse walks into a Bar. The barman says "Why the long face?" The Horse had cancer.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is something I love to eat, the other is a watermelon.

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Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

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A man walks into a bar, he says ouch.

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you wanna hear a good anti joke?, so do i

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What is the difference between Chuck Norris and a frog one wears pants and the Chuck Norris doesn't.

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sex with dead people. they can't say no;)

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?  The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that :  L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

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What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

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Q: what's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon A: well the first noticable difference is that the watermelon tastes better.

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I'm a white rapper I do it all the time Folks don't like me cuz my words don't match

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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Rebecca Black. That's it. That's the joke.

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Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

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Whats worst than reading the 8th anti joke that ends with the Holocaust? The one where it ends with someone getting hit by a fridge for the 9th time.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're daughter has terminal cancer.

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What did the blind, deaf, retarded kid get for Christmas? Spoiled.

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Why did Bob fall over? He was impaled by a narwhal. -BG

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Q: What's worse than getting a divorce? A: I don't know, i'm still married.

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A Muslim, a Jew and a Christian are on an airplane talking about religion. The Jew tells the Christian he believes in a single holy entity. The Christian says he believe Christ is the Son of that very same entity. The Muslim says "When can I get out of this room?" because he's been detained at the airport due to religious profiling.

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Dear crush, I want to drink you

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Person 1: Hey how's your day? Person 2: Good Person 1: Cool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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