Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? monkey see monkey do why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? it lost its footing why did the girl fall down? she was hit by four monkeys and a refridgerator

What did one hand say to the other? Nothing, you fool, hands don't talk.

Bitch

what did the n i g g e r with alzheimers say to the c h i n k? 9/11 was the funniest fake joke since the holocaust and 9/11 and the holocaust and 9/11... and... what?

Roses are black Violets are Black I'm Hellen Keller

matt has ebola...funny right!?

A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. It was the chickens decision thus, not affecting your life greatly. You should therefore mind your own business and let the chicken live his life with capability of using it's rights.

What did the blond say when she got into a car crash? Nothing, she died.

A black man and a midget walk into a bar. They notice the beverages are unreasonably priced so they leave.

What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

knock knock... who's there? your grandmother, now please let me in it's very cold outside. *you now proceed to open the door for your grandmother as she is elderly and you dont want her to freeze

What's the difference between a blonde and a carrot? One's a human, the other's a vegetable.

What did the blind man say to the train conductor? Nothing. He was mute too.

Roses are Rose, Violets are Violet.

why did the chicken cross the world becuase he had to go in the bathroom

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

your a vagina says you, your a booby

Why did captain hook die? He wiped asss

Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

What do you call the CEO of a successful company? Rich.

What happened to the chicken when it crossed the road? Nothing because the cars that almost hit it swerved off the road.

Why can't Jade Goody go swimming? Because she's dead.

Q. Why didn't the man tell his girlfriend about his big lottery win? A. Because it was none of her business.

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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