What do a cow and a banana have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

Have you ever listened to the smell of the color 9? It tastes like freedom!

Knock, Knock Who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill your neighbor. Can I have some flour?

Whats worse than a rotten tomato. a fridge hitting your baby.

why did the kid drop his sandwich? his hand was cut off

John has 7 apples and Lisa has 4 apples John eats 3 apples and Lisa eats 1 apple and give another to John Their diets lacks various essential nutrients

How do you kill a black man wearing a bullet proof turbin? Shoot him anywere other then his turbin.

Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

Why couldn't the man open his car door for the women? He drove a jeep with removable doors

How does Hitler tie his shoes? With little Nazis.

Three gay men are in a bath tub and bubbles come up and one says "who farted?"

your skull would make a nice pen holder

a jew walked into a bar-mitzvah

Yo momma is So Fat? And isn't your cousin Chow Yun Fat? I think I know some of the Fat family. How are they all doing?

Heyy everyone text this number 320-510-3277 Kay ask him why he poops the bed at age 17 .. His name is mike geier.. Haha

That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

I took a vampire out for dinner last night. I expected her to cringe when I ordered a rare steak, but we decided not to let my tastes impact on the evening, sharing wine and many stories before heading back to my apartment.

A black man wearing a belt. Oh, he has a shoelace!

A horse walks into a bar, the bartenders asks "Why the long face?"

A black man and a white woman cross paths while walking on the sidewalk. After greeting each other, they continue on their way. Each goes on to enjoy their respective day free of racism and sexism.

Whats funnier then a dead baby a dead baby dressed as a clown

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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