why did the duck fall in the water? It got shot

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Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

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A buddhist,islamist and a prohibitionist walk into a bar.

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I have never liked jokes. They promote laughter, which is the music of Satan strangling hairy children and wildebeast. I'd like to thank anti-joke.com for their work in the struggle against hilarity.

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You know what happened when I kissed a girl? I enjoyed it so immensely that I received an erection.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither Has He.

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I AM SATAN, YOU SHALL LOVE ME BEFORE EVERYBODY ELSE! YOU SHALL STONE THY INSOLENT CHILDREN! THY SHALL R*PE AND KILL IN MY NAME! YOU SHALL HANG MY SON ON THE CROSS WHICH I SACRIFICED BECAUSE HE IS IMMORTAL/BECAUSE I LOVE YOU? "Moral" "Man": Joke is on you, who do you think I am, God?

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why did the kid fall down the stairs? he had polio

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What's big, an instrument, has black and white keys, and is located in the bathroom? I don't know. A piano. But why in the bathroom? Don't tell me how to furnish my house.

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What did George Washington say before he crossed the Delaware? "Get in the boat."

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A: What did the orphan get for christmas? Q: Nothing she doesn't have any parents

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

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vaginas are pretty!!!!

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven hundred and eighty nine.

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Q: What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: One is a person, one is a food.

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A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

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Once upon a time, A lonely man was living in the woods. He died of exhaustion, dehydration, starvation, and bacterial infection. The end. Once upon a time, Another lonely man was living in the woods. He built a house, made a well, made a farm, got married, had kids, and had a wonderful life. The end.

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A man walks into a bar. He's black. Its 1962. He is immediately arrested.

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What do you call an Asian man without any clothes on? -naked

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Why did the boy yawn? Because he was tired.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

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Religion.

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Why are rich people so rich? they're not poor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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