How many kleptomaniacs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

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What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

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cake cake and no cake, your life just ended

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Q. What has 5 chins, 10 eyes, 10 feet, and 50 fingers? A. Five People.

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What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

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Theory: Jesus: Father why must I go die in order to defeat sin, is sin not a product of humans? God: SHHH! You want humans to know they are stronger than us? Real life: Later on the cross Jesus: FATHER WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY! God: *Thunder* Moral: Makes sense... Kinda? Maybe? A bit? I honestly do not get it :(

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So there are two skunks in a bath tub. One of the skunks says to the other, "Would you please pass the soap?", and the other skunk says, "What do you think I am, a talking radio?!"

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Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

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You know whats funny? A man cooking dinner.

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Heskey time.

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Have you ever seen that gay clown in asda.

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What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far

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Two attractive women were getting ready to visit the gym. On the way there, they stopped at a local sports store to purchase some new shorts, and they got it at a good discount price

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What did the orphan get christmas? CANCER

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I like my women like I like my coffee Without a penis

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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My name is me I like fired chicken!

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What did the friend say to the other friend? A. Hi friend.

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Billy Mays and Michael Jackson are up in Heaven, because they died recently.

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Scumbag steve walks into his friend's dorm room, and finds out he has epilepsy. He then flicks the lights on and off really fast

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How do you make lady gaga cry? Give her bad romance haven't you heard this joke before......DUMBASS

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

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What's the difference between a truckload of bowling balls and a truckload of dead babies? You can't unload a truckload of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops