Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

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How do you put a baby to sleep? Snap its neck.

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ermm Hello ? what about me says rishi with a tear down his eye

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NEVER

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Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

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My mother-in-law fell down a stairway. I turned to my wife and said “Call an ambulance!!”

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A lot eh?

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(sniff) (sniff) It smells like gross diarrhea in here... (sniff) (sniff) ... Yeah it does

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What do you call two gay guys? People who should be living in California.

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what did the old lady die of old age...

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What did the dog say to his owner? Bark.

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Why did the spy cross the road? To get to the other hide.

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Your mom is so ugly- Wait, hold on. How are you born?

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How do you make a sausage roll? Wrap some sausage meat in a pastry dough made of plain flour, water, salt and fat, and bake it in an oven.

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What do you do if you walk outside and see your t.v. floating in the lawn in the middle of the night? Go back inside.

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Three Arabian men are on a plane, they stand up, and shout BOMB, BOMB, BOMB! All three have Tourettes.

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How many vikings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Probably just one, though I'd imagine it hard to teach someone from the 9th century C.E. how to, let alone explain electricity.

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Two gay guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would notice...

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Why did the black man crash his car? His low-income job forced him to buy a toyota.

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what do you call Mackenzie Phillips? five head

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A mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? the black man

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whats the best thing about life? whatever the best thing about life happens to be!

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Can you help jack Off. The elephant?

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Where do baby apes sleep? In apricots

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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