What weights more than a 300 pound man? A 400 pound man.

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Larry The Cableguy....thats it.

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Why was Harry arrested? Because he stabbed multiple children.

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A blonde is elected President of the United States. Half way through her inauguration speech, she forgets how to read.

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What if someone sold your socks to a Jew? I would blackflip through the air and shit on his chest.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

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their is a box of mystery. wat is in that box?? do u no wat is in that box!?!?!?!?!?!?

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what did the maker of anti jokes website say while reading some of the jokes on here? these people r idiots. and he lived happily ever after. then died. Good one

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink.

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Why does beonce say to the left, to the left. she doesnt she sings it.

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Whats worse than getting an eye gouged out? Getting both eyes gouged out?

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Why'd the kid stick ice up his nose? To keep his lunch cold.

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A man walks into a bar

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Knock Knock Who's there? The IRS. You've been convicted of tax evasion.

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How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

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What is human, went bankrupt eight times, got a small loan of a million dollars, and is over all a terrible person? Your probably thinking Donald Trump Well your correct.

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what do you call a middle-aged man with one blue suede shoe on, purple hair, pink skin, white eyes, no toenails, 67 fingers, 1 eye, a pocket watch, no clothes, and 8978967564567898765432345678765321234568909876543w245678909876543456098765323456-0987654367890-098765435678-09876543456789098765432345678909876543456789098765435678909876543234567898765323456890-987654345678900987654323456890987653234567890765434568909876543456899876543456789098765434568909876545678987654345678987654567898765434567898765478579458765456789876543223456789876543098765432123456898765432678987654230987653-098765434567898765434898765434567898765456787654567876 butt cheeks? bob.

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What do you call a woman with no arms or legs that fell off a boat fucked

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What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Chemotherapy.

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I've got 99 problems and they're all stressing me out and causing me to be very unhappy.

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I think everybody should have a penis.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

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69

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What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to use a female name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops