Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What's green, fuzzy, and can kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

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A person tells an anti-joke. Nothing out of the ordinary happens.

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What is worse than menopause? Falling down the stairs breaking your next....

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have u ever have to clean up ur own poop? me niether.

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Alot of people try to make shitty jokes on this webpage, thinking they're funny. They aren't.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? On average 2,950, however, this has not been properly tested due to obvious reasons.

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Why was Carlos fired? Because he stole and smelled of weed.

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender. How do you get them out? Well you shouldn't. Leave the car in front of somebody that you hate's house.

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this joke is funny so dont read the rest even though there is no rest

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If life hands you melons, you might be dyslexic.

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Why did the hipster burn his tongue? The tea he was drinking was at an unsuitable temperature for consumption resulting in the scalding of his mouth.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

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There is a bus full of puppies and babies with a plane flying above it carrying 2 tons of explosives. The Bus arrives safely at its destination.

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I find Holocaust jokes hilarious, Anne Frankly I know a few...

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there are 2 muffins in an oven one says "man its hot in here" the other says "shut up i hate this joke"

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what is the ??? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

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Yo momma so fat, she's in the hospital dying of morbid obesity. Sorry man.

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Where do dizzy cows go? In circles...

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Friends are like potatoes - when you eat them they die.

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Why is the Asian 2nd grader sad? Her best friend was diagnosed with breast cancer. She has 3 weeks to live.

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Why isn't eating an Olympic sport? Because that wouldn't make any sense.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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