Q.Why did Beethoven kill his chicken? A. It had contracted a serious illness. He had killed it as an act of mercy.

How dou you find the population of mexico? Take a census....... By throwing a dime in the street!

How many times has Belle Ahern been hit in the mutt 76. Stupid slut

A paraplegic women falls off a boat. Regardless of the fact that she was wearing a properly inflated flotation device, she still managed to drown. She died instantly, the next day.

knock knock whos there? your neighbor, dude im sorry but i swear i didnt see your kid on my drive way.

politically correct!

You come across a blonde, a brunette, and a red head. Why are you telling a joke? Go make sex.

A Jew, Catholic, and a Mexican walk into a bar. The Jew leaves first for an unrelated reason.

A dog walks into a bar. It was a bar in Taiwan, so they killed it and ate it.

How do you feed 1000 people? Cook 1000 meals .

Women

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

How do you tell if an alien had been in your house? All your lightbulbs are gone and your fridge is pregnant.

How do you get your children out of a cardboard box? You open the box to see your dead children's corpses

What's brown and sticky? A lump of shit.

Know what's funnier than the holocaust? Almost everything i can possibly imagine. The holocaust was a terrible case of mass extermination due solely to naxis racist views

What do you call someone who is unwilfully forced into a life of emotional abuse and domestic violence? My daughter.

Knock Knock! Who is there? I am the milkman and I have your milk.

what gets louder as it gets smaller? a baby in a trash compacter.

Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

What did Electra give her Dad for his birthday? Head. That's why her name is Electra.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have alzheimer's, cheese on toast

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow who? The one from the farm across the street. Can Randy come play outside?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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