Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

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how much did the asian man pay for his operation? nothing. he's dead.

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Large 4

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What has a head but can't see? A penis.

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Why did the baby boy start crying? He got hit with a toaster

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Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and due to genetics could not see well without the help of glasses.

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Yeah i'm into fitness, Fitness whole pizza in my mouth.

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Y

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chicken is a funny word, and the road is a plot device.

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just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

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What do you call a guy with no arms and legs sitting on your street corner? Suicidal.

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An Australian man walking in Manhattan is approached by another man who pulls out a switchblade and says, "give me your wallet or I'll stab you with this knife!" The Australian man hands over his wallet. A nearby police officer witnesses this the last moment of the mugging, arrests the criminal and returns the Australian's belongings.

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how do you make a little girl cry?? Kill her family

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Take sebastian deep into the woods and put him down quickly

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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Yo' momma is so fat, that- Wait. Sorry. Too far?

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What is worse than blue balls for a guy? Depending on the girl, absolutely nothing. Moral: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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Q. What's brown and sticky? A. A stick.

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Where there is a will, there is generally a grieving family... I miss you, dad.

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

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Why didn't the black man eat lunch? Because his lunch asked him not to eat it.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cher. Cher who? Just Cher.

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whats worse than nailing 8 babies to 8 trees? nailing 1 baby to 8 trees.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops