What's the only think duct tape can't fix? Your parents divorce.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Wait...what?

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How many walls can you paint with a baby? Depends on how hard you throw it.

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What's black and has the texture of tar? Molasses

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What do you get when you cross a turkey with a turtle? A bunch of nosy ass people wondering wtf you're doing.

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Why was the boy upset? His penis fell off and his mom was making him go to the library.

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What's the difference between a bench and a black man? The bench is an inanimate object incapable of thought

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What did the tree say to the boy? Nothing. As i recall, trees are unable to speak and or show signs of emotion.

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what do you call a toddler with a gun? uninteresting

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Is that my bread? I sure hope so.

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Why did steve cry? Because he got punched.

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I have this friend named Rachel, so I call her Rachel.

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Adam Thomas is homosexual

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whats worse then having sex with a blonde? having sex with a cactus

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Roses are red violets are blue this poem makes no sense refrigerator.

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Knock Knock ************************** No-one's home

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What did Britney Spears say to the Mexican? Hit me baby Juan more time.

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Cool story bro. Tell it again.

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What's the difference between camping and molestation? I wasn't taken camping as a child

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Well, he was dangerously fatigued from having weeped passionately the entire night in the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of 20 years and consequently finding out that his only daughter was in a tragic school bus accident.

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A doctor, a farmer, and a blonde walk into a bar. The doctor orders red wine because he knows it's good for the heart. The farmer orders a Piña Colada because he likes fruit. The two men wait eagerly to what the blonde is about to order. The blonde opens her purse and says "Damn it, I can't find my credit card." Suddenly, a handsome young gentleman walks up to her says "Don't worry miss, I'll buy a drink for you. What are you having?" The blonde looks up and says "Don't worry? I just lost my credit card!" In a fit a of anger, the blonde storms out the bar and doesn't order anything.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grizzly bear in your apple

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I wanted to burn alot of calories so i found a fat kid and set him on fire. :3

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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