If you give a mouse a cookie... ...youre ruining its natural diet. it might die.

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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How do you find out if your son is ok? Ask him.

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Boy 1: Hey do you want my last chewing gum? Boy 2: Yeah please! Boy 1: Same. The boy continues to eat the chewing gum and finishes his shit wandering why the boy walked into the same cubicle as him.

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Roses are red. Violets blue i do fuck people. MAYBE u too?

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How did the rock cross the road? It didn't cause it's a rock.

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I have an erection My mom!

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What do you get if you mix razor blades with babies? An erection.

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roses are red violets are blue i'll be back in an hour or two

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Yo momma so stupid, she failed the 2nd grade math

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Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7? A: Cus 7 had AIDS and it was bleeding all over the place!

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Yo mama so ugly everybody died. The End.

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Why was Jimmy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a trick question. Feminists can't change anything.

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What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

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How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

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why did the chicken cross the road? there was chicken food on the other side

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What do you call a blue chair A black person

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Emily Scarpello...Fat Couch

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How do you distinguish between an unlabeled carton of milk and an unlabeled carton of cream without breaking the seals? You label them.

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What do you call Helena… A Shady palm tree

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cats are pussies

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look under under where under under where. under the couch

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Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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