Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Your mother is so fat she has made a concerted effort to loose weight and lead a healthier lifestyle

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have down syndrome, my favorite color is potato

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the boy go to his room? Because his father told him to.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

In soviet russia, the cow milks you!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I used to be an adventurer, but then I decided to retire.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are brown Violets are brown There is crap in my garden

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell off and bumped his head Mama called the doctor an the doctor said, "I am calling Child Protection Services."

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: why didn't the little black boy have a father? A: because he unfortunately died at the age of 48 with pancreatic cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you simply have a chicken joke WITHOUT it crossing the road

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do you call a blind man who buys a caller i.d.? handicapped

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks into a bar, purchases a beer, and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How fast do Jews cook? It depends how many you have in the oven at once.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Say the line below sixteen times very fast: I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... Done? Good boy!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

cchina is communist the USA isnt WHY?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

LIFE :(

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Yo mama so ugly... she has an extremely bad burn on her face.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

An Italian, a Mexican, and an American are sharing a meal on the Titanic. They all died for the women and children first.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what did the turnip say to the plum? nothing, as most fruits and vegetables would've said

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Well... At that time everyone expected that the only people that knew hypnosis where either "born with the gift from the stars" or was some old beard man that spent "hundreds of years in the mountains".or a wizard or a shamanic priest, or well some guy in a particular stupid suit of sorts, it increased its potency simple as that, as having people stare at me and laugh because "You are not some beardy guru master" is a pretty bad start for the effective use of mass hypnosis. Mono-ideoism actually just means really concentrated focus on a single object or state of mind, the thing about the name (aside from sounding kinda mono-idiotic) is that strong focus alone does NOT lead to a state of relaxation which is one of the prime requirements to achieve a state of trance, I mean try focusing on something really hard and your body produces a huge amount of beta waves, aka stress. All of that is bullshit, but my horrible childhood did leave me with the "gift" to space out pretty quickly, so I learned it pretty fast without really knowing what it was at first.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops