What's the difference between an ice cream cone and a pile of dead babies? I don't cum on the ice cream before I eat it.

what has 52 teeth and holds back a monster? my zipper

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, as I wasn't there, and frankly I wonder why a chicken was anywhere near a road anyway

Q. If you're paddling up river and you lose three tires, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? A. Purple because ice cream has no bones.

Man, It's so hot in here that the horses name is friday.

there once was a frog with no leggs

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

What did the Black man get after a month's worth of manual labour? A reasonable wage, that was above the national minimum wage standard which states his and everyones right to a certain amount of money

Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.-South Park

Q: How did the blonde girl get into Harvard? A: hard work, dedication, and a perfect SAT score.

Jimmy and Ted are racing each other at the end ov the street. Jimmy is taller and thinner but Ted has more endurance. Who wins the race? A: the drunk driver

What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's rich...

anti-joke.com

Why was ticklish Tom not ticklish anymore? A: he got hit by a train

say cheese

A man has had too many beers late at night. The bartender says "Sir, I'm going to have to cut you off"

What do you call 100 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A weird kind of genocide.

What is yellow and writes? -A Ball Point Banana!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

If you are on this site, you have a shitty life. It is even shittier if you read this.

yo mamma is so stupid she failed high school

-Will you follow the live coverage of 86th Acacemy Awards? -No. -Are you anti-semitic?

Remember Y2K? That could have been bad.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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