What did lil' Suzy do when she got home from school? She was violently mutilated by a bear then continually but raped by a man she met on the Internet. Needless to say, she had a great time. -Harrison

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A1: he was shot. A2: he died A3: the forest was being cut down and he got into a machine and was shredded to pieces A4: he fell asleep

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's black and white and read all over? Corn, I lied about everything.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why are you so gay? Because I am unequivocally attracted to the same sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot for Arabian Air, idiot. What were you thinking?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the baby cross the road? It was nailed to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you get when you cross a cat with a fish? A dead fish.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How much seamen does a gay guy have??? A whole butt load.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew. The pizza doesn't scream in the fire

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I am aware that my positivity makes me do some bad mistakes, but if negativity is the alternative I will keep taking my chances.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what is friendship? when friends go on a ship

thumb_up thumb_down -10

B=boy G=girl B:hey i got a good nock nock joke but you have to start it G:okay nock nock B:whos there?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why do black people like fried chicken? Well you see....

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Prince of bell air with Keanu Reeves: SMIIIIIIIIIIITH! DID YOU DESTROY MY COUCH? Neo: ... WELL DID YOU BOTHER CARLTON DOING HIS STUFF? Neo... Will you shut up then? ... Intro: This, is my story, read the text, thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

squash squash who squash my ass

thumb_up thumb_down -10

there was a guy who had 2 horses... he entered them into races... they were rubbish... kept losing... so he entered them in 1 big race and said hed get rid of the loser... the horses made a plan to finish it at exactly same time... he heard them talking and said HOW DARE TALK

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you make your friends more positive ? Infect them with HIV.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did a car full of African-American men pull up to a lonely, caucasian man walking on the sidewalk at 12 p.m. in Harlem? To ask for directions.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the German Constitutional Court issue Decision 2 BvR 1390/12 on September 12, 2012? Because they wanted to refuse the request for a temporary injunction in regards to the European Stability Mechanism!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

POLITE NOTICE: Management Committee here. Please refrain from posting any anti-jokes which are not offensive to protected groups.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: What did the poor man do when he saw a Ferrari? A: He realized that he would really enjoy having the money to buy such a nice vehicle, so he decided to take it upon himself to enroll in night classes. After many years of hard work, he earned a degree and a high-paying position at a large software corporation, and bought his dream car. He often told the story to his children as an example of what hard work and a goal in mind could achieve you. He lived a long, productive life and died fulfilled.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

whats black and has many friends? a kind sociable black person

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops