"Hey baby, did it hurt when you fell from up there?" "Waaaaaaahhhhh..." "Ok, let me kiss it better."

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How do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? You don't, the giraffe is a savanah animals and there is no physical way for a giraffe to fit in a refridgerator.

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Roses are red, violets are purple.

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One day in Africa there was a family of Americans touring an African village. They were a happily married couple with a four year old son. This day however was a very sad day because a group of elephants came trampling through the village. The couple left there kids inside and went to help control the elephants. however the elephants killed them all with their feet. Now the little boy wandered outside because after all he was just a little boy. He was about to be killed when a baby elephant calmed down his mom, so he saved his life. The baby elephant then took the little boy back to the airport by which the married couple came because elephants are very smart. The boy didnt want to leave his new found friend the baby elephant but the little boy was then sent back and lived with his Uncle. When he was older, he had a child of his own, a little boy. One day he decided to take his son to a circus, that was from Africa. He didnt realize there would be elephants there. This day the elephants got spooked by a mice and started to stomp all around. Then the man realized his son was missing. He looked down to find his son about to be stomped on by this old elephant. Just as the elephant was about to stomp he and the man made eye contact. The man thought noticed the look in that elephants eyes, like he reconized them. He thought mabye, just mabye it was the same elephant he was saved by. Turns out it wasn't and the elephant killed his son.

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And so i say to the preist ........... pass the bananas

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roses are red,violets are blue,faces like yours belong in a zoo,but don't worry i'll be there to,not in a cage but laughing at you!

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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Did you here about the guy who got his right leg and right arm cut off? I made him up but he would make one good anti-joke.

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What worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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There were three elephants in a bathtub. One said, "Pass me the soap." The other one said, "What do you think I am? A Radio???"

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Where did the did the Islamic person fly the jet to? Ben Gurion International Airport located in Israel

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What starts with f and end in uck Firetruck

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What did the piece of macaroni say as they boy was about to eat him? Nothing. Foods are uneducated and illiterate therefore unable to speak, and went into the boy's mouth without a trouble.

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Why do leprechauns laugh when they run through the grass? Because it tickles their nuts.

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Why is the boy home alone on Friday night? Because HItler took he's parents away.

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Why was the man choking? He was eating to fast.

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A boy walks into a shop He buys some sweets.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This doesn't rhyme F*ck it

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Roses are red My bulb is blue My pants are extending When I look at you

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What do you call a penguin in the desert? A penguin.

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How do you blindfold an Asian person? Take a price of cloth and put it over his eyes

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Did you know that a hamster and a cigarette are almost the same? How? Because they are both completely harmless until you put them in your mouth and light them on fire.

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"Oren" Tifa is not around here, besides she does not like you anymore, get lost you wacko!

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How many black guys does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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