Punching a baby

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? a pizza does not have a heart

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A priest, R Kelly, and Michael Jackson walk into a bar. They proceed to molest small children.

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Tiny timmy likes timmy turner in his time of tingling on christmas.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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you mooma's like a bowling bowl i pick her up finger her throw her down the gutter and she still comes back for more

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What's the difference between a duck? both of it's legs are the same.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? About 1 or 2, then the neighbors would phone the police and you would be arrested for infanticide.

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today at school... I learned about all the core subject plus the additional electives.

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long in the tooth!

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s s is for shit h h is for hit i i is for it t t is turtle

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what has two legs and is red all over? half a cat

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why does jake have so many guns? hes compensating

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what did batman say to robin? get in the car

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Why did the gambler sell his house? Because he needed money to pay for male hookers.

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What did Newton say to Einstein? Nothing, Newton was dead before Einstein's birth.

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Why do black people have white hands and feet? Regardless of race or ethnicity, the skin on the palms and soles of the feet is always less pigmented than elsewhere on the body. In darker skinned people this fact is readily observable, but in light skinned people this feature of human biology cannot normally be discerned by simple visual inspection.

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I've got the whole world! In my hands! I've got the whole world! In my hands! I've got the whole world! In my hands! Now you must listen to all of my demands or I will crush you all.

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John has 32 candy bars, he eats 28..what does he have now? Diabetes.

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Two guys walk into a bar the third guy ducks

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I forgot my joke about gamblers, but i bet you would have loved it!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it's goal was to get to the other side however unfortunately a giant gorilla picked up a car; threw it at a nearby building causing it to collapse; setting off a massive explosion causing all of the buildings on that side of the street to collapse. As the whole other side of the street was covered in rubble making it impossible for the chicken to get to the other side, so the chicken decided to turn around and go home.

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What do and Asian and an orange have in common? They are both complex, carbon based life forms living on the only world in the universe known to harbor life.

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Q:Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, an honest lawyer and an old drunk are walking down the street together when they simultaneously spot a hundred dollar bill. Who gets it? A:The old drunk, of course; the other three are mythological creatures.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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