Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Why aren't elephants allowed in public pools? Because they are elephants.

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Why did the Elf stab the Gnome? Because I was on a bad acid trip.

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Dad, why are we Swedish? Because antilopes and the butterfly effect son.

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What's red and hurts your teeth. Answer: a brick

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Why did Darren Wilson quick scope Michael Brown? Because he was being attacked, racism is wrong

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what was the last pizza place the twin towers ordered from? Domino's

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So 2 black guys walk into a bar and the bartender looks around and say "what will you fine gentlemen have?" and they order and payed their tab and could not have been more courteous, amirite?

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Why was the man sent to the hospital? He got crushed by a flying refrigerator.

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Knock knock Who's there No one We are all on the computer

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Roses are Roses Violets are Violets I am to Literal, That is a statement.

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So does Blake

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six had severe paranoia.

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A man walks into a bar. He suffered concussions later that night.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm extremely unstable. And So are you.

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I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I'm allergic to peanuts. DAMIT

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A blonde walks into an electrics shop and asks to buy a television set. The shop-owner explains that she is signalling a microwave and is concerned for her mental wellbeing.

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Yo mama so fat when she went to the ocean the whales started to sing we are family even though your fatter than me

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Why does girls have two left feet and two left hands? Because girls have no rights.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he thought he saw a dangerous predator in the area and crossed the road in an attempt to flee the dangerous situation.

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A man with no face walks into a bar, another man sees this and promptly asks "Sir, why do you have no face?" The first man says nothing and walks away.

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knock knock who's there? rude, interrupting cow rude, interrupting cow who? just kidding, its steve. cows can't talk

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Why did the boy drop the ice cream? Because he had a seizure.

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216-409-7176 Call me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops