What's green, has six legs and would kill you if it fell on you out of a tree? A pool table.

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What lumpy and pointy? A horny woman with breast cancer

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

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what do u call 2 puerto rician men playing basketball? won on won

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What did michael jackson say to the boys he touched? Nothing. Hes dead

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roses are red violets are blue maskrosor are gula

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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Your momma is so fat that when she fell over, she couldn't get back up without help, and she probably got several bruises.

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Women's Rights.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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What do you call a white basketball player? A very athletic hardworking dedicated human being.

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What did one friend say on his friend's myspace page? You need a Facebook

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Why was the woman?

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"I see." said the blind man to his deaf son.

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Guy finds lamp in the desert and rubs it three times. No genie appears because there's no such thing as magic.

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Anthony sucks

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What did the boob say to the bra? sup bra

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I may be ugly, but I'm also dumb.

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How did the black guy get out of prison? Further evidence in the case was found which proved that the black guy was actually donating blood to a local blood drive for children with leukemia.

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Nero was my name thousands of years ago, but I believe that those With clearer sight, brighter minds, those you remaining WITHOUT the sense of Complete doom, oh children of the night, know far better, turn to my side, and sheep you shall be no more, together we shall be Whole once again, the sheperd of this New world! Thumb this up if you have seen the signs... Thumb this up if you have seen the sins... ...End up buried under the corpses of everything you knew if you have no vision in this New dawn of ages endlessly darknening, and pretend that the internet will be there, or that the horsehead network ever mattered to you for that matter... :You say insanity today, sunday 27th January 2016, you will be the one running, begging that Our world is but YOUR INSANITY, a nightmare, which only Death will awaken you from

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There's 2 guys in a Y shaped road. One road leads to a cliff with deadly alligators below the river. The other road leads to the village. You can ask both of the guys one question to which leads to the village. However, one guy always tells the truth and the other guy always tells a lie. How do you get to the village? GPS

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why did Suzie get raped? because she was out past her bedtime. and the morale to this story is that its funny to be raped.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops