roses are red, violets are blue, my son is gay, f**k my life...

why did the kid let go of his kite? He got struck by lightning

how do you confuse a blond? put them in a circle room and tell them to sit in the corner

What do you call a woman that is on her period? -A girl that is expirencing a difficult to control flow of blood through the clitorus.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Neither has he.

So lion bites off a mans foot. He bleeds to death.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a room? This is impossible as dead babies are incapable of achieving such a feat.

your mom is so black that it can be assumed she is of african descent

My Grandma has Alzheimers and always repeats what she says. My Grandma has Alzheimers and always repeats what she says. (Submitted by Aidan)

what's more fun then stapling a dead baby to a fence? ripping it off

What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

Why did Mark get paralyzed? Because he was a famed football player that went drafted for the 1st pick but was later hit so hard that his spine com pulsed and tore

What is more black than a Nigerian marathon runner? The night sky

What happend to the boy with no family? he died in a tragic car accident along with his family

What happened to the turtle that was on land Dead

What's little and very sad? A 5-year old locked in a cage.

A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

A man punches a 3rd grader in the stomach. Not long after he is arrested and no longer is allowed within 500 feet of a public school.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm homosexual And so is my boyfriend Jeremy, with whom I have shared countless evenings of joy and laughter.

Q: what's the difference between a young, geeky kid living in Wisconsin's basketball and Yao Ming's basketball? A: young, geeky kids cannot live in Wisconsin's basketball. Wisconsin is a state, and states cannot own objects because they aren't sentient beings. And Yao Ming's basketball... is just a regular basketball that happens to be owned by Yao Ming.

Q: What did the littl boy with cancer get for christmas? A: Nothing, he didnt make it that far.

You might be a redneck. Sorry.

Hey! Where is my tracker?

Once a upon a midnight haven. Along came a cow name Mr. Maven. For they say the cow was very lucky. But oh what a day for something very mucky. Oh ye the coming of Mr. Maven and his milk. And for every cereal there will be silk. But wait isn't Mr. Maven a guy? How can you milk him even if you try? I don't know, just sounds cool.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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