A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, Ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

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Knock, knock Who's there? You... and you just lost the game. -Eka

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just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

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Q.What has flashing lights and really bad dancing A.Baby haveing an eppilectic fit

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Why did the police officer pull over a black guy? He was going over the appropriate speed limit for that area.

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How do you get 100 people in one car. You can't.

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Two cows are standing in a field. One says to the other: "Hey are you worried about this Mad Cow Disease?? the other cow says "Nah, not at all mate...!" "Why Not?" says the cow "Because I'm a CHICKEN!"

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What did Batman say to Robin after they got on the bus? We should have taken the batmobile.

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What's the difference between 9/11 and Jenga? The World Trade Center wasn't ruined by clumsiness.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? He graduated at the top of his class with a master's degree in engineering.

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Knock knock Who's there? Be Be who? Be yourself

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What is a Mexicans favorite sport? Tennis.

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Why did the white man cross the road? To pay his taxes.

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Wanna see me count to ten? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10.

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A dyslexic man hears a joke, and laffs.

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Hey! I just met you. And this may seem crazy. So here's my number: Now Get in the van.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This is a poem The End

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What's greasier than a baby? A burger

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Hey I'm You're mother..... Haha Jk you're adopted

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why was the man sad? his wife died

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I once saw a fat child eating a sandwich. I wondered what was inside.

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What is Lady Gaga's real name? Who the crap knows?

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Two horses are playing in a field, One says to the other "Hey, sup" they then continue playing.

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what did the lamp say to the hand? You turn me on

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops