How do you get an alien baby to sleep? Well, first you need to get an alien baby.

A man decided to enter the local pun contest. He sent in ten puns. One of them was very witty and he won the contest and felt very good about himself.

Q. What's the difference between a bench and a Mexican? A. A bench is an inanimate object used for sitting on while a Mexican is a human being.

Q: Why do homeless people smell bad? A: Because they live on the street and they dont take showers it's very sad sometimes.

What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

Whats worse than burning your foot? Getting it eaten off by a cannibal.

david poredos

._____________________. Whale!

YES! EXACTLY!

Yes, I'll have the cordon bleu, see voo play.

roses r red violets r blue u jumped in the air and saw a planet to

How do you get a one-armed kid down from a tree? Wave.

Three guys, stranded on a desert island, find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish. The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home. The second guy wishes the same. The third guy says "I’m lonely. I wish my friends were back here."

What do you call a man who's eating thirty big macs ? Hungry.

roses are red violets are dead honey is yellow and so is head

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

how do you rube out a circle? don't draw one

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why did a black man bring a baseball bat to a white man's apartment? Because he was stopping by his friends house before heading to a rousing game of baseball.

The Sun is vital to our human existence on the Earth. It also causes cancer.

Wanker

It is Scientifically proven that, if you have a shower in china... you get wet

What happened to Timmy went to get ice cream from the ice cream truck? He was raped and never seen again, his family now mourns there loss

why was the gay person gay? he liked penis in his bum.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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