Q. What is worse than being British???? A. Not being British

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Isn't it funny that we think it's totally normal for females to not have penises but for literally EVERY OTHER group of people, it's weird and not ok double standard?

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A black walks into a bar Because it is still around the time of segregation, they don't serve colored people

thumb_up thumb_down -42

what did the blind santa say to the jewish child jewish people don't believe in santa...awkward.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Why did the black man work at a Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because he was fired from his job at a grocery store, and it was the only job he could find on short notice in the current job market.

thumb_up thumb_down -82

What's the difference between a duck? An armchair, because a vest has no sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down -110

What's 2+2? It's certainly not 1.

thumb_up thumb_down -116

How do you divide 2574 by 23.5 WIth a calculator

thumb_up thumb_down +109

knock knock who's there? Kallie Kallie who? sorry, wrong house

thumb_up thumb_down +95

Ask me if I'm a duck. Are you a duck? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

What do you get when you cross and elephant and a dog? Nothing, because you cannot breed creatures of different geniuses.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why didn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it made him mean.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A sphere rolls around the corner and falls over.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down +13

I am not under the alkafluence of inkahlol. The drunker I am, the longer I get.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A women go hit by a car, what everyone woners though, how did the car get in between the bedroom and the kitchen?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man enters a bar, and says: "It is impossible to drown in an elevator" This is incorrect.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Sarah Palin walks into a bar and the bartender tells her to get the f*&k out.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

If at first you don't succeed.... maybe skydiving isn't for you...

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what did the 35 year old man say when he walked in his home last night? Nothing, he started crying because he saw that someone had viciously killed his guinea pig.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops