A priest walks into a bar, which is suprising because priests don't usually go to bars.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what is worse then stubbing your toe in the dark? -september 11th

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the Black man drown? Because he could not and did not know how to swim. Because he could not afford the lessons to learn how to swim. Because he does not have the financial means to afford a lesson in swimming. Because he is of a low socio-economic level.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

There is an Asian, an American, and a Mexican on a falling plane. The pilot announces that the plane is plummeting out of the sky and says that he needs to drop the cargo. The pilot drops the cargo but the plane is too heavy still. The pilot tells the passengers to drop some personal belongings. The Asian drops rice, the Mexican drops his guns, and the American throws the Mexican and yells "Remember the Alamo!".

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How the hell did Susie get on the swing anyway I don't know you tell me?

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Where's Justin Beiber? With his girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

thumb_up thumb_down -141

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

What did the boy say to the Vietnam veteran? Where are your legs?

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did robin get in the batmobile? Batman told him to

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Yo Momma's so fat she has Type 1 Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's worse than finding twelve dead babies nailed to a tree? One living baby nailed to twelve trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What is Osama Bin Laden's favorite food? I don't know, and to be completely honest I doubt you do either.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What does Rubens Barrichelo does with his F1 championship trophies? He never got one.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Fat people.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Tim tebow is the anti christ

thumb_up thumb_down -38

So a gay guy walks in a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind, get out." The gay says he will drink in the corner. Later, a construction worker walks into the bar. He says," Man, I'm so thirsty I could drink the sweat off a cows balls." The gay guy in the corners says," Mooooooooo."

thumb_up thumb_down +183

what did the cow said to the other cow? Moo

thumb_up thumb_down +79

Why did the beach ball pop? Because it stepped on a sharp chocolate chip cookie!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one. Lady Gaga has a small one. Madonna doesn't have one. What is it? A last name.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I hate girls that try to act hard. Like calm down you dont got a dick.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops