once upon a time jeff peterson was taking a daily walk when he stops and stares at a strange object. it was an assasin with a knife who slaughtered jeff decapitating his head while his family cry's. THE END

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

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How many dead lions can feed a bluejay? Bluejays don't eat dead or living lions, so this is highly improbable.

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There's a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead who sit next to each other in college. They are good students and regularly do their homework.

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Why did the elephant cross the river? CAUSE YOLO (even though he died)

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What happened to the peanut who went to New York City? He got a-salted

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What did the boy say to the Vietnam veteran? Where are your legs?

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Want to hear a joke? I'm sorry.

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What's the longest, hardest thing on a black man? His femur.

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Why is Jem no longer a cartoon? Because they all died from toxic hairspray.

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How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

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why did the bear eat meat? he was hungry

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How Do Bulls Drive Cars? They cant, they have hooves making it impractical for a Bull to Drive a car.

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Your mother is so good in the kitchen that we all asked for a second helping.

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Why are black people more athletic than whites? Black people originate from Africa, where they lived in a world where athletic ability created natural selection. The most athletic were able to escape dangers of the jungle such as dangerous animals, and were also most apt to find food to survive. Then when the slave trade occured, only the strongest and best fit survived the trip to America and the hard labor. Also, given the socio-economic trends of the United States, African Americans are more likely to grow up in an environment where they have limited opportunity to make a living, besides professional sports, so they play cheap sports like basketball.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Grass is green, Trees are brown.

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Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

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Why can't a T-Rex clap? Because they're extinct

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Q:How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A:Just Juan.

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What is the easiest way to babysit a black kid? Find an activity that you can both relate to and enjoy. Hopefully after doing this for a while, the youngster will become tired and fall asleep. You can then watch TV, read or talk on your cell phone until his or her parents get home.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Cause he's dead.

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hi, im sober.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops